Friday, March 5, 2010

Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes (or Cents and Sensibility)*

As part of this campus wide pageant I'm participating in, this last week, I've had to solicit monetary donations--generally in the form of seven to twelve cents at a time--from my peers. These donations are collected at the end of the week and given to the American Red Cross.

Although some feel that collecting change donations would be easy, you would not believe how much animosity a hungry person coming from Philosophy 240-501 can have towards one innocent young girl trying to raise money for the Red Cross.

I'm all like, "Howdy, sir! Would you like to donate to the American Red Cross?"

& he's like, "No. I'm good."

He says this as he's heading to the dining hall so I'm like, "Yeah, well you enjoy your lunch since the people in Haiti and Chile are starving. Bastard."

He turns around & I point at another pageant contestant.

Some people are nice. Like the unsuspecting middle school kids who visited our campus today:
Wondering whether they're going to help me


& then once I started pretending to cry the cash really flowed!


Dear children from Yes Prep: I am sorry for taking your money. I am trying to win a contest. Please do not harbor bad feeling towards Puerto Ricans or Texas A&M University.

There was also this guy that that gave me all the cash in his wallet. I almost asked him if I should get naked now or later...

Reader(s),

when someone asks you for donations, it's seriously okay to say, "I can't really afford it/ I'm not carrying cash/ I just donated," <-- even if it's a lie. It's way better than making eye contact with me but then staring at the ground when I start talking to you or ignoring my question while maintaining awkward eye contact.


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