Sunday, April 4, 2010

When Hell Freezes Over

Before I even start, I just wanted to point out how funny Google Adsense is. I write ONE blog with the word "midget" sprinkled throughout & now the ads on my page say things like "Half Pint Brawlers" and "Seven Dwarfs Ornaments" and "Book Midgets Wrestling." I liked it better when I had that large PeiWei banner running down the right side of my page.

Part of me wants to go back and include the word "penis" in every post--just to see if all my adds will come up as male enhancement or porn.

ahaha. I'm just kidding.

Anyway, for that painting class I'm in, we're currently working on a collage. Knowing that I suck, I decided to be as ambitious as possible, if not simply for the fact that I've got nothing to lose.
I am now crafting Botticelli's Birth of Venus out of magazine scraps. Part of this project required that I dig through my collection of old magazines and clip things out--and by collection I mean magazines I was just too lazy to recycle stacked up on my bathroom floor. One of the magazines I came across was RollingStone's issue that ran from December 24, 2009- January 7, 2010. It was their "00" issue, recaping the first decade of the millenium in music and American culture, but mostly music. --> They did such a good job, I moved this magazine to my book shelf in order to preserve it for the posterity.

Anyway, the cover article, entitled, "A Decade of Lost Chances," begins with this:

" It was a decade in which we saw our leaders squander the peace and prosperity of the previous decade. We watched as they sold us into an endless war, stomped civil liberties and trashed the economy, all while the icebergs kept melting and the seas kept rising. It was a decade of lost chances, which we can only hope are not last chances."*

I felt pretty terrible after reading those opening few lines and it really made me think about time and the social changes I've lived through. Some of them have been amazing; my family was stationed in Germany when the Berlin wall came down, and during my time in college, I saw the first Black president take office, as well as the first Black Disney Princess. <--The Princess & the Frog is my favorite Disney Classic, Ever.

I loved it so much, I want to name my daughter Evangeline.

But a negative change has also taken place consistently, if subtly, throughout my life.

I live in Texas. A stupendous indication that you are, in fact, in the Lonestar state is it can go from 80 degrees to thunderstorms to snow all within the same week. Notice how I said snow; it has been fucking snowing.
Those of you from other states may not understand the significance, but snow in Texas is a big deal. Up until I started college, I understood that snow in Texas is really hail--lots of hail that piles up and covers everything in ice. Yeah, we make fist-fulls of the stuff and throw it at each other like it's snow. We might even pile up as much as we can gather and make pathetic little ice snow men out of it--but it's always been ice, never snow.

Until recently.

I came to Texas when I was 8 and since then I can count on my hand the number of times it has actually snowed since I've lived here--4.
Once on Easter weekend of 2007,
once in November of 2008,
and finally twice this year.

See how rare snow is here? At the first sign of snow, I took a picture of backyard thinking, "Oh, how cute. It's kinda snowing."

But then this happened
Followed by this:

This is me, scared and overwhelmed, leaving yoga in my flip flops because just the day before it was fucking 75 degrees outside so I figured the snow was just little flurries. This sign points to visitor parking but also wants you to know it's with stupid.

I am no scientist. In fact, I'm an English major--chosen precisely so I could avoid all science and math courses I would surely fail. But I'm pretty certain all of this recent snow business in Texas can be traced back to global warming. It's kind of scary, right?
On the same train-of-thought induced by afor mentioned RollingStone article, I thought about our generation(or my generation, really, since you could be generations ahead or below me). The baby boomers felt their lives could be summed up with one important question: Where were you when Kennedy was assassinated?
My generation, Generation Y (which I just googled), will be defined by the following:
  • Where were you when 911 happened?
  • Where were you when America mobilized and invaded the Middle East?
  • Where were you when Obama was elected?
  • Were you watching when the Saints totally dominated Superbowl XLIV? <--ahah, that was just for me.
I can remember my answers to each of these questions. In particular, the third question, I remember watching TV and the moment the broadcastors declared that Barack Obama was our new president and I remember the anchor comparing our/my generation to the baby boomers. That was a truly powerful moment, not just because I was witnessing history, but because of the baby boomer comparison. WE ARE so much like them; we're living in a time of anxiety and political upheaval and we have all the means to change the world.--We really do.

With that said, I urge everyone to pick something to be passionate about--it doesn't have to be global warming or health reform. It can be recycling or better treatment of the elderly, better sex education in public schools, AIDS awareness, or even just keeping the highways clean from litter.

It doesn't sound like fun, but some of the best hours of my life were spent collecting trash on the side of a highway with my fellow TAMU Multi-Cultural Greeks. :)

Whatever it is--understand that you have the power to make things happen.
I know that to end with all of this motivational prompting of good deeds is a weird place to end up after the quote I began with, but I did that for a reason. As the article points out, lost chances do not have to be last chances. Furthermore, I chose to name this post "When Hell Freezes Over" as a pun because of the snow. Hell, which some might consider East Texas, has in fact, frozen over. That means in this time, we can make any thing happen because the impossible has already proven itself to be very real and tangible.
What's more impossible than snow in the middle of March in Texas? A lot of things--but that's besides the point.

I'd like to leave you with this thought:
penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis.

God, I hope my parents never read this.


& Happy Easter, Reader(s)!

*Sheffield, Rob. "A Decade of Lost Chances." RollingStone; Best of the 2000s 24 Dec. 2009: 15-34. Print.


  1. Apparently, including the word penis prolifically means adsense puts "mormon singles" ads on your page. go figure. it did nothing to get rid of all the midget ads, either.

  2. Apparently, including the word penis also means "dog pics". Go figure.
    Anyways. I loved this post. If everyone did what they were passionate about and not just what would give them the most money, the world would be a better place.
    But it's not like most people will ever come to that conclusion.

  3. haha, Adsense is crazy!

    Thanks! I have hope that people will at least be vocal about what's important to them, even if that's the extent of their action. But I honestly believe we need more volunteers making things happen--even if it's just a hobby.