Saturday, May 21, 2011

scenes from the river, pt 1

I've been meaning to blog about the fab4 trip to the river immediately following our last final exam.
The only problem is: I don't necessarily remember all of it.

If you factor together the fact that I had slept a total of 3 hours in 2 days, had an empty stomach, and a full bottle of adult beverage (plus my fair share of Fatty's jello shot bags), it's pretty easy to understand why this trip was so memorable...though I can't remember it.

I overdid it.
like A LOT.

So, since I can't post one continuous story, & since I'm convinced my way will be more fun (& also because I am determined to post things besides TMFFS), I'm going to post bits & pieces in no particular order.

So:

Scene: gas station in New Braunfels.


Me: *lifts head from seat* Where are we?
Gaga: We're at a gas station. Fatty's buying a coke. Want me to grab you anything?
Me: I want to sit in the back. I'm so tired.
Gaga: You should move back there.
Me: I think I'm too sick to move.
Gaga: I'll help you, come on. *Pulls me out of car*
Me: *gaaaaaag*
Gaga: *laughing*
Fatty: *comes out of gas station & approaches car* Eww, why are there strawberries in your throw up?
Me: ...Strawberries?
Gaga: Those aren't strawberries, it's just globs of jello.
Me: Gaga, you're going to hate me, but I threw up on your foot...and my feet.
Fatty: Here, rinse yourselves off. *hands over water bottles*
Me: I'm so sorry, Gaga. *rinsing off his feet*
Gaga: *laughing* It's okay, it's like we've come full circle.
Me:...what?
Fatty: I peed on you at the river...in the river.
Me: that seems wrong... like you peed on me?
Fatty: well I peed right next to you in the river & you didn't move.
Me: ...Why didn't you say anything?
Fatty: I told you & you just sat there & Gaga even tried to move you!
Gaga: It's true, I totally tried to pick you up & you said, "no, leave me here. I like it."
Me: liars. & that's not even a circle.
Fatty: ...what?
Me: Gaga said it's a full circle because you peed on me & I threw up on him. But it's only a full circle if he swaps fluids with you now.
Fatty: hmm... (to Gaga) well maybe you can spit on me later.
Gaga:...yeah, later. But first, *bends me over*
Me: *flirtatious giggle*
Gaga: & now open your mouth.
Me: *obliges*
Gaga: *pull outs camera, camera flashes* haha, this picture looks like you're throwing up! It's like I caught you in the moment! So funny!
Fatty: Oooh! Let me see! *laughs* Good one, Gaga!
Me: ugh...*crawls into back seat* When are we leaving??? We've been here for hours!
Gaga & Fatty:... *exchange looks*
Fatty: Yeah, why are we still here?
Gaga:... I don't know. I guess we can go now...

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