I often marvel at the things my friends post on facebook.
& FTR, I use the word "friends" loosely because my facebook account is really just a forum where I let 1000+ strangers know what's happening in my life, although I'm certain they don't care about my cheese preferences or how many energy drinks I can consume before spontaneously combusting with rage.
Anyway, so strangers, some people I knew in high school & vaguely know from law school, people I used to sit next to in History of the Theater at A&M.
And then, you know, my handful of real life friends.
I AM GETTING WAY OFF TRACK HERE.
What I mean is starting with this post, if one of my facebook friends posts something I think is entertaining, I will be re-posting it here. (& yes, I'll be using FAKE names)
So, without further ado:
Pruscilla: I watching da Maury show & I just thank God I never had a baby cuz if I was prego there would be between 2 guys or one time maybe 3 different guys would've been da father. But thx God 4 always being there 4 me & thank goodness 4 me never getting prego!!!! U've been there 4 me God.
(I also feel it's worth mentioning that the same friend who posted this status, then proceeded to "like" it). **
Cousin & facebook friend of Pruscilla, Jeb, in response: WOW! What personal information you love sharing with people! I tried warning you before...but seriously...nobody needs to know how many people you've been sleeping with at the same time...realize how that makes you sound! and look! once aga...in im tellin you this cause your fam!!!..if not id let you burn yourself repeatedly! Also I think its weird also to thank god for not getting pregnant while getting down with multiple guys before marriage?!?! Come on ur really letting me down!
Pruscilla: Sorry bro. But dat's how I feel!!!!
Jeb: Understand how you feel...but some feelings need to be left inside!!!
Pruscilla: Ok. I understand that, but sometimes it just so hard to keep inside!!!! U gotta understand that.
Jeb: Yes i understand that..but everyone has that problem...the difference is that everyone else holds it in! Thats all i have to say with anymore of what you put on facebook! Thanks and have a good day!
Pruscilla: U 2 bro!!!!
The best part of this post, arguably, is that I get to once again use the picture I made on Paint:
The second best part of these posts: they require almost no work on my part except the ability to copy, paste, and delete.
**I am reposting these statuses EXACTLY as they were published. I am neither embellishing, nor correcting, any grammatical errors or colloquialisms. & I am NOT fabricating statuses I think would be funny and reposting them--that would require work & defeat the purpose of these posts.