Wednesday, December 14, 2011

All Over The Place

"& in the end, you have to put the individual ahead of their actions."

This was moral of Chasing Amy, a Kevin Smith film where our protagonist combats feelings of inadequacy when confronted by his beloved's slatternly past.

I'm going to be brutally honest to the point that I not only embarrass myself, but where YOU, my beautiful reader,  actually start to reconsider your opinions of me--and not in the good way.
I stalk the shit out of girls who once dated or fucked my boyfriend.
(& if you just so happen to be stalking me because I now date someone you dated or slept with; or because I have dated someone you once slept with/dated, or are currently sleeping with/dating--you have my permission to do a little touch down dance & thank Baby Jesus that you're not the only crazy fuck out there.)

Whenever these girls turn out to be complete 180s from myself (as I'd like to think so many are because I'm a gawddamn special snowflake), I start to wonder whether I'm even my boyfriend's type...
As you can imagine, this gives rise to insecurity (May I present to you, from the vaults of yore, Exhibit AExhibit B;).  So this film really resonated with me, is what I'm saying. I'm about to take a wide left turn, but before I do, here's why this paragraph is relevant: 

So to tie this all up in a nice ribbon before I move on, I'm going to say that whenever we date someone we should let their past stay in the past. Digging up the past & harboring resentments from acts long committed and dead can end relationships.

Here's the part where I go kamikaze: this doesn't just apply to relationships!
Aha! Way outta left field, what did I tell ya?

Ok, so I was in college the first time I realized something really important: sluts can be good people, too.
I say this with confidence as someone who was in a sorority & had intimate friendships with many a sorostitute, see definition 2, & as someone who was unfairly and wrongly accused of being a whore in high school.

Promiscuity is not and should not be considered a good indicator of whether someone is intelligent, has a good heart, or is a reliable friend.

& on a side note, it's really fucked up that in our society, we create this correlation between a woman's value and her chastity. Republicans, Conservatives, Fundamentalists--take note; the day this government tells me that I can't get access to birth control is the day me & all the unashamed sexually active women in this nation (AND the guys they're fucking) take the streets pitch forks & torches in tow. That's a cause I believe in, motherfuckers.

Anyway, where I'm really trying to go with this is to say that often times, we are illogical when it comes to judging the character of others; we make irrational conclusions about who they are based on the most illegitimate of criteria & rather than focusing on one negative and irrelevant aspect of a person, we should strive to take people on the whole.

To tie this into current affairs, I'd like to bring up the recent Lowe's controversy, wherein Lowe's pulled advertising from a tv show about Muslims in America after being bullied by Christian Supremacist groups, who fail to understand that being Muslim is not a good indicator of whether someone is a good American. The reality of a person's religion tells us nothing (despite what some may argue) about whether someone is a kind neighbor, a dutiful citizen, a valuable part of the community.

We are all a collection of mistakes and bad choices, I think we need to keep that in mind before we jump to undeserved conclusions about other people and ruin friendships, relationships, or even advertising opportunities.


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